Where did he go?
That’s the question that has been burning inside my heart since last night.
Rocco died yesterday. I’ve never experienced the death of a person or pet I was very close to. I’m not religious (not even a little). I’ve always had “issues” with death, meaning I have always had a burning curiosity about death and a burning fear of my loved ones dying.
I have so many feelings about yesterday, but the one that literally kept me up last night was, “where did he go?”
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Today, Rocco passed away peacefully on my lap.
Rocco came into rescue having a few health issues and they only got worse over the 6 weeks we had him. He had a history of seizures (and once seized in my car), a ton of growths in his liver, some fluid in his abdomen, heartworms, joint problems, and severe anxiety.
They did some blood tests and ultrasounds and the results didn’t look too great. Last week, when we were in Petsmart, I decided to weigh him over at Banfield. He weighed 15 pounds less than he did a couple of weeks before. I told the rescue about his dramatic weight loss and they scheduled a vet appointment for the following week (today).
I took Rocco to the vet (Christian was at work) and P from the rescue met me there. The purpose of this appointment was to do more blood work and another ultrasound to see how his liver was doing.
I’m obsessed with our future house already, even though it will probably be a few more years until we buy it. I’m thinking about all of the customizations we’re going to have done. The DIY projects. Ohhhh, the DIY projects. My Pinterest boards are bursting with ideas. I get more and more anxious whenever I find more awesome ideas I have to try. Life is so short! I need a house now so I’ll have time to do all of these projects!!
I’m also obsessed with dogs (surprising, I know).
Here are my favorite customizations. Some of these customizations I want to implement into our home. The others I probably won’t try, but I included them on the list just because they are too cool.
I knew this would happen. I’ve heard a lot of Dane owners talk about all of the attention they get when they’re out and about with their ponies. I was super excited about the prospect of getting to talk about a passion of mine every time I’m in public. But now that I’ve been in the situation, it’s awkward.
We’ve taken Bubba out a few times already and every time someone walks by, they stare. I’m okay with the staring; I stare at giant dogs, too. How could you not? At the beginning, when I would notice someone staring, I would meet their gaze and smile politely. Sometimes, they would ask a question or make a comment and I was excited to jump into conversation. That was fine.
But now I’m beginning to feel awkward. I notice these people looking and my two options are to either acknowledge them or ignore them (unless they start talking to me).
I’ve lived with a Cairn Terrier for almost 10 years. From what I’ve seen with my own life and the lives of my friends, life with a dog is the generally the same, regardless of size: they bark, they get underfoot, they require love and attention.
Since we’ve welcomed our first giant roommate, I’ve noticed that it is a lot different living with a 130 pound creature than it is with a 20 pound terrier.